Young Malawians have been quick to adopt social media as a way of meeting others and finding love, causing traditional elders to fear for the future of their cultural norms.
Traditional authorities in Malawi, as elsewhere in Africa, are feeling increasingly uncomfortable about the rise in popularity of social media sites like Facebook, which they fear are undermining their ability to dictate cultural terms to future generations.
Malawi’s traditional leaders still have some claim to be the custodians of cultural traditions in the fields of music, fashion, marriage, intellectuality and politics. But its young people have been so swept up by events in the global village that the country is now being forced to rearrange its cultural values. For the elders, the situation seems to be getting out of hand as they desperately try to maintain the beating of the drum to keep the youth interested in the ways of the past.
Paramount Chief Chikulamayembe of Malawi’s northern district of Rumphi says that new technology has made the youth lose respect. “It has eroded our cultural traditions,” he says. “Marriages used to be orderly, even their expression through music used to be understandable and following the cultural norm. Now it is beyond our comprehension.”
He claims that the influence of the Internet has moved from the towns to the countryside. “The rural youth gets busy with farming, livestock herding and all rural household chores, while the urban youth are at home with home theatres and computers and smart phones,” says Chief Chikulamayembe, who was a journalist in colonial days. He fears the rural youth are falling under the spell of their urban peers and in danger of completely losing their cultural practices.
According to digital analytics company Socialbakers, there are around 134,880 Facebook users in Malawi, of which the largest group (35 percent) are aged 18-24, followed by 25-34 year olds (29 percent). The overall gender balance was 68 percent male users, against 32 percent female.
Traditionally, a young man would go to his uncle for help in proposing marriage to a family of a young lady he admired. Sometimes the young man’s parents would arrange with the young lady’s parents for the two to marry even before they have met. “I got my girl, Wezi Chirwa, from FB [Facebook] – I didn’t know her one bit and we lived in two different worlds. I liked her picture and when I dated her I discovered that she was intelligent and open-minded,” says Bright Mhango, a journalist in his mid-20s. He went ahead and scheduled a meeting with the girl at Blantyre’s Chichiri shopping mall, basically for her security since she could not meet a total stranger in a private place.
“We moved our relationship away from FB, met more, and now… well, we are ten months in love and marriage talk is rife between us,” says Mhango. On second thoughts, he admits, meeting someone this way is unethical, because his Facebook account might have been hacked and he could easily have been a kidnapper. “The Internet doesn’t reveal the real person but it does reveal the available person, so with a simple customised search on FB, you can find just the girl you want, age-wise, location, education and even searching by surname,” says Mhango.
Yaliwe Nalishebo, a young female entrepreneur, says culture has gradually lost its value over the years. “Soon our customs and norms will be shelved in museums, and this is why you find the whole world knows your marriage intentions before the parents do.” And she asks, “Is this a new approach to day-to-day life? Should it rob basic fundamental procedures of marriage? I don’t think so.”
Dating through this media, she says, is not a good idea, as it may deprive one from the most important aspects of dating, which is face-to-face contact. “Lies are inevitable, as you are not able to see one’s eyes to judge. Sexual advances are a jackpot on these sites. The issue of sincerity is questionable. It is said all is permissible but not all is beneficial,” says Nalishebo.
Peter Makossah, who works in the film industry, says that Malawi is advancing with the rest of the world and skills will definitely change. “Cyber communication being the easiest in this day, the young generation have taken their opportunity to move with the time.”
The advocates of Malawi’s traditional practices are probably fighting a losing battle when they try to stand in the way of new media technology that seems to be reshaping the country’s cultural values and traditions. Perhaps embracing these technological advances, so that cultural practices are in tune with global trends, is the only way to create a win-win situation, while ensuring a balancing act that does not lose sight of what they consider valuable practices, culturally and traditionally.
